![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Thursday, November 25
Nov. 26th, 2021 12:05 amToday I am grateful for:
A good phone conversation with my Mom, and she sounded very cheerful. My Trainwreck sister says that Mom thinks the hospital is her home, and doesn't mention the house.
I spoke with Trainwreck sister, and she told me about what's going on with another sister's partner.
My sister N's partner went into the hospital because he couldn't breathe, and they found lesions on his lungs, likely cancer. They are doing a biopsy on him to be sure. One way or another, my sister N's life is going to change pretty drastically. She isn't that old, about 70, but her health has been awful for years. She really can't live alone. She has fallen several times and can't get up because her knees are both bad now. She sleeps most of the time yet says she doesn't get any sleep, and is very overweight. She's also addicted to prescription drugs. She says she can't afford to keep living in her house if something happens to her partner, even if she could get the help she needs.
It would seem that if her partner can't come home, she may be looking at a care home. She would very likely end up in the same care home as our Mom.
So, that makes for a solemn day. It might be kind of awful to say, but I only feel so badly about N's partner's illness, in that he is in his 80's and has had a lot of health problems, and we've had a lot of time to consider his mortality. It's still sad for everyone, but not sudden?
There's not much chance of him coming home if his breathing was as bad as they say.
S (N's partner) has been part of the family for about 30 years now. I've had mixed feelings about him, mainly because of how he and my sister "met". She was BABYSITTING for S's wife at the time, so she was about 14 and he was 30-ish. They did not have a relationship after that, my sister moved away, got married and had kids with someone else, but then they divorced and my sister moved back home, and picked right up with S again (then separated from his wife). They've been together since, about 30 years.
S was always decent to my sister, though he has shortcomings. Mostly he is a pretty easy going guy, nice to talk to, and was always helpful to our family. Especially my Mom. He would always do things like drop things off or haul things away in his truck, run errands. He did that for all of his siblings who were much older than him, and took care of them. He quit drinking when he and my sister got back together as adults, and generally was a fun, decent person all these years. Of all the "brother in laws" I've probably had the most interaction with him, and spent the most time with him. I would say he's a kind person.
So, I walked around outside (it was above freezing and pleasant) and spent time with the animals, and tried to be present.
It seems like this last couple of years has been a lot of things like this. Two of my sisters lost their partners recently, my husband's Uncle passed this autumn, his Grandma earlier this year.
To try and at least do something, I found some workable clay in the garage where we've been storing it, and I worked on trying to make an ocarina. I've been wanting to do that forever. I managed to make a very rudimentary one, more or less a whistle without any holes. It took a very long time to figure out how to cut the air exit hole to get it to make a sound.
A good phone conversation with my Mom, and she sounded very cheerful. My Trainwreck sister says that Mom thinks the hospital is her home, and doesn't mention the house.
I spoke with Trainwreck sister, and she told me about what's going on with another sister's partner.
My sister N's partner went into the hospital because he couldn't breathe, and they found lesions on his lungs, likely cancer. They are doing a biopsy on him to be sure. One way or another, my sister N's life is going to change pretty drastically. She isn't that old, about 70, but her health has been awful for years. She really can't live alone. She has fallen several times and can't get up because her knees are both bad now. She sleeps most of the time yet says she doesn't get any sleep, and is very overweight. She's also addicted to prescription drugs. She says she can't afford to keep living in her house if something happens to her partner, even if she could get the help she needs.
It would seem that if her partner can't come home, she may be looking at a care home. She would very likely end up in the same care home as our Mom.
So, that makes for a solemn day. It might be kind of awful to say, but I only feel so badly about N's partner's illness, in that he is in his 80's and has had a lot of health problems, and we've had a lot of time to consider his mortality. It's still sad for everyone, but not sudden?
There's not much chance of him coming home if his breathing was as bad as they say.
S (N's partner) has been part of the family for about 30 years now. I've had mixed feelings about him, mainly because of how he and my sister "met". She was BABYSITTING for S's wife at the time, so she was about 14 and he was 30-ish. They did not have a relationship after that, my sister moved away, got married and had kids with someone else, but then they divorced and my sister moved back home, and picked right up with S again (then separated from his wife). They've been together since, about 30 years.
S was always decent to my sister, though he has shortcomings. Mostly he is a pretty easy going guy, nice to talk to, and was always helpful to our family. Especially my Mom. He would always do things like drop things off or haul things away in his truck, run errands. He did that for all of his siblings who were much older than him, and took care of them. He quit drinking when he and my sister got back together as adults, and generally was a fun, decent person all these years. Of all the "brother in laws" I've probably had the most interaction with him, and spent the most time with him. I would say he's a kind person.
So, I walked around outside (it was above freezing and pleasant) and spent time with the animals, and tried to be present.
It seems like this last couple of years has been a lot of things like this. Two of my sisters lost their partners recently, my husband's Uncle passed this autumn, his Grandma earlier this year.
To try and at least do something, I found some workable clay in the garage where we've been storing it, and I worked on trying to make an ocarina. I've been wanting to do that forever. I managed to make a very rudimentary one, more or less a whistle without any holes. It took a very long time to figure out how to cut the air exit hole to get it to make a sound.
