Monday, May 9
May. 10th, 2022 12:17 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
gottawonderToday I am grateful for:
A beautiful, warm day.
I managed to get up a little earlier than usual (for me).
Not so much grateful:
Trainwreck called again, and more or less just told me the same thing that she did the other day. That she thought she was going to get a super sweet deal on Mom's house that my brother T was going to swing for her. She quoted a dollar amount that was WAY below market value, but she's saying that would be fair because if we sold it to her, there would be no realtor's fee. She literally thinks the house is worth about HALF of what we could likely get for it.
I got kind of annoyed with her, because...I don't know why she's saying this. She's not getting a deal. She's getting the opportunity to buy the house at fair market value, according to Sister S and Brother T.
So I got a little terse with her, and stated that my understanding was that she was getting an opportunity at fair market value, not a SWEET deal.
Then she responds with "why does it matter to you if I get the house?" and I replied that it was important to me that the house gets assessed (not just whatever my Brother T thinks is a fair price) and that she goes through a bank for the mortgage so that we are getting a fair price to give to our MOTHER, and/or the estate.
Then she later texts me saying "I'm not trying to take $$$ from our Mom".
Well, what does SHE thinks it would be, if she cuts a deal with our brother for half of the actual value of the house?
So (sigh), I called Sister S, to tell her that Trainwreck is still thinking she's getting a deal, and is Sister S ABSOLUTELY SURE that our brother isn't trying to give her the house for some ridiculously low price? S says that T is on board with the plan of getting fair market value.
BUT!!!! I find out that Brother T COULD sell the house, and not need Sister S's signature. So there's that. Nothing is really keeping him from doing this behind our backs.
Yeah, so I'll try not to let this ruin my near-future life.
The bigger question is, why is Trainwreck even bothering to tell me what she's doing, if she already knows I'm not supporting her plan?
Sister S says that Trainwreck isn't even talking to her about any of this, only Brother T (yeah, because he's the one who could actually sell her the house). By telling me, all Trainwreck is ensuring is that I call Sister S for clarification.
So why tell me? Just to piss me off? She enjoys the power she has to ruin my day?
So once again I force all of this off to it's little box in my brain, so that I can try to enjoy my day.
I went to pottery, and joined the sculpture class that this lady D did for us.
She brought in a taxidermied owl as a model, and gave us tips to sculpt it.
It is actually quite mentally intense to look at a model and try to sculpt it in a formless block of clay in front of you, then try to render some details like feathers.
After that, I still had my normal things I was trying to get done in pottery, and kind of rushed to get them caught up.
D was the other potter who stayed late too, and we chatted a bit.
Today I learned a bit about sculpture from this class.
I also learned that the nine-banded armadillo gives birth to four identical twins each time, because the original fertilized egg divides into four identical cells, which develop from there into pups. They are more or less clones, and each litter are all the same gender.
https://carnegiemnh.org/armadillo-identical-quadruplets-every-time/
A beautiful, warm day.
I managed to get up a little earlier than usual (for me).
Not so much grateful:
Trainwreck called again, and more or less just told me the same thing that she did the other day. That she thought she was going to get a super sweet deal on Mom's house that my brother T was going to swing for her. She quoted a dollar amount that was WAY below market value, but she's saying that would be fair because if we sold it to her, there would be no realtor's fee. She literally thinks the house is worth about HALF of what we could likely get for it.
I got kind of annoyed with her, because...I don't know why she's saying this. She's not getting a deal. She's getting the opportunity to buy the house at fair market value, according to Sister S and Brother T.
So I got a little terse with her, and stated that my understanding was that she was getting an opportunity at fair market value, not a SWEET deal.
Then she responds with "why does it matter to you if I get the house?" and I replied that it was important to me that the house gets assessed (not just whatever my Brother T thinks is a fair price) and that she goes through a bank for the mortgage so that we are getting a fair price to give to our MOTHER, and/or the estate.
Then she later texts me saying "I'm not trying to take $$$ from our Mom".
Well, what does SHE thinks it would be, if she cuts a deal with our brother for half of the actual value of the house?
So (sigh), I called Sister S, to tell her that Trainwreck is still thinking she's getting a deal, and is Sister S ABSOLUTELY SURE that our brother isn't trying to give her the house for some ridiculously low price? S says that T is on board with the plan of getting fair market value.
BUT!!!! I find out that Brother T COULD sell the house, and not need Sister S's signature. So there's that. Nothing is really keeping him from doing this behind our backs.
Yeah, so I'll try not to let this ruin my near-future life.
The bigger question is, why is Trainwreck even bothering to tell me what she's doing, if she already knows I'm not supporting her plan?
Sister S says that Trainwreck isn't even talking to her about any of this, only Brother T (yeah, because he's the one who could actually sell her the house). By telling me, all Trainwreck is ensuring is that I call Sister S for clarification.
So why tell me? Just to piss me off? She enjoys the power she has to ruin my day?
So once again I force all of this off to it's little box in my brain, so that I can try to enjoy my day.
I went to pottery, and joined the sculpture class that this lady D did for us.
She brought in a taxidermied owl as a model, and gave us tips to sculpt it.
It is actually quite mentally intense to look at a model and try to sculpt it in a formless block of clay in front of you, then try to render some details like feathers.
After that, I still had my normal things I was trying to get done in pottery, and kind of rushed to get them caught up.
D was the other potter who stayed late too, and we chatted a bit.
Today I learned a bit about sculpture from this class.
I also learned that the nine-banded armadillo gives birth to four identical twins each time, because the original fertilized egg divides into four identical cells, which develop from there into pups. They are more or less clones, and each litter are all the same gender.
https://carnegiemnh.org/armadillo-identical-quadruplets-every-time/
no subject
Date: 2022-05-10 07:53 pm (UTC)Hoarding issues aside, TW needs to have her head examined.
I was today years old when I learned the truth about armadillos!
no subject
Date: 2022-05-10 08:41 pm (UTC)Her estate is whatever she has decided upon in her will. It could be that whatever is left is divided among all of us, and that is what I keep telling TW. There are nine of us, and cutting her a special deal means taking money away from Mom, and from the rest of us.
I was browsing the real estate in the same small town that my Mom lives in. There is a little house around the same age, size, and condition as hers selling for more than twice what my sister thinks she should have it for.
no subject
Date: 2022-05-11 01:57 am (UTC)Leonardo stayed in the family house to care for his mother until she went to a private care home. The house was sold, and all the money was used for her residence and care. When it was time for a funeral, they split the cost six ways, even though Leonardo had been a caregiver for many years and was single. But he didn't complain. No one got a sweet deal.
Another story: there's an extended-family cousin of mine who got the lion's share of his mother's estate when she died. He stayed with her and looked after her for many years while his six siblings did not. His (fundamentalist Christian) siblings are contesting her will.
I can understand both men's position in these stories, but unless your TW had the role of sole caregiver while everyone else was absent from your mother's life, I think she's mad as a hatter to want her deal.
no subject
Date: 2022-05-11 02:21 am (UTC)She was not the sole caregiver by a long shot. My brother T, his wife, and son have done a lot for Mom, My Mom's brother, My sister S, Niece A has done a lot, and many of us have done smaller things when we could. It has been the effort of many of us.
TW does deserve something for her efforts, BUT the sale of the house is to support Mom. Right now, giving TW some kind of deal would be taking money from Mom, who only has so many assets left. This needs to take care of her needs for a while.
The other side of the coin, is that there are a few members of our family that could really use any money that they might get from the estate. Yes, maybe TW could deserve more than some members because of her help, I don't know if she's been compensated a bit all along or not.