State of mind

[gottawonder]

I few nights ago, as I was in that no-man's land between awake and asleep, I slipped into an altered state of some kind.

I literally was inside of some kind of dome, that was...inside of myself, within my consciousness, and I was speaking to a person who was a version of myself (I don't recall what we were discussing, maybe just the nature of this space). The feeling of this whole experience was one of near-perfect indifference to my emotions. The fears, anxiety, worries about my animals, sadness over things long lost, fear of death even, were all outside of this space.

For just a moment, I experienced a sense of peace, a distance from my emotions.

Yet, with a great deal of regret, I chose not to stay there. My emotions were an important part of my life, and to deny them would be to deny my authentic self.

I would like to be able to go there whenever I chose, more to just explore the idea, and to have moments of stepping away from overwhelming situations to gain perspective. I don't want to shut myself off from my feelings, but wouldn't it be nice to take a break, just so you can sleep? After all, most of the fretting and anxiety we have at night is absolutely pointless.