Wednesday, June 26

[gottawonder]

Today I am grateful for:

Beautiful weather. There were threats of a storm, but it didn't happen.

I got more mowing done while I let everyone out into their pastures.

I was able to get in a very short session with Dandy at home, and he listened so well! I got really good connection with him.

I went to see River today; we had our lesson.

We worked a bit in the indoor arena, and it was a good opportunity to see how River felt about the tables and stuff set up for the upcoming events. He wasn't worried about them, which is great. Not even when R used the mike to speak.

We ran through our freestyle indoors, and it went pretty well. Some small tweaks, but I really want to go through it enough with the music from beginning to end to feel confident. I try not to over do it either, but going through it all the way at least once per session has helped me feel like I know what I'm doing.

Then we worked outside, and practiced the classes that will be in the upcoming show, and while none of it is perfect, it's not bad, either.

I am trying to adopt an acceptance of things, as in, I have put in solid work with River on all of these things this summer, and at a certain point it just is what it is.

Mostly, what I want out of this, is to participate in everything with connection with River, to do it all calmly, and that he listens, and that I can be a good sport.

I brought a western saddle I've had for a long time and haven't used in a very long time to the barn for another rider to try. I knew that she was looking for one, and maybe this would work. It's no biggie for me either way, but if I can sell it for a good price and it gets used, that might be better than me just hanging on to it.

She tried it, and wasn't sure, but she's going to ride in it again to see if it grows on her.

My Sweetie stopped in to say hi, then went home ahead of me to start supper.

I got home and we watched more "Justified".

Comments

[cf2princessawnw]

You sound like you have a good mindset in footing for heading into the show. You practiced very well, and now you're playing on peace that we need to become especially for River.
cheers for all your hard work and for your endeavor to maintain the attitude you want.

[gottawonder]

I hope so.

I'm not one of those people with a positive outlook on competition. I don't like losing or looking foolish in front of people. I don't have that resilient "oh well, it's all a good learning experience" mindset.

People can talk all they want about "winning isn't everything", but try placing at the bottom or near the bottom of every class in a show, or having your horse just outright refuse to do whatever it is you're trying to do together, or get distracted by everything and be too nervous to perform. NO ONE enjoys that feeling.

I'm really trying to go in there just looking to do okay, to have River stay calm and stay with me, and to get through it with some dignity.

In the days before the show, I don't want to get into that frustration of trying to be perfect, and get all worked up. I'm not going to fix much of anything in the time frame we have left. I just want to feel like we're in an okay place where we might not be perfect, but we're okay.

[cf2princessawnw]

I think your last paragraph and what you said about that whole subject is exactly On Target. And I wish you the best with that exact plan. It's balanced and reminds me a lot of the days before performances with music and what my professors would say as advice, also what I've seen professionals say about performing.

You stated it well about how not winning or doing well or having something like what you've mentioned happen, can feel just plain awful. Thanks for reminding me if that. I remember competitions in high school and Junior High. I often did very well, but your words reminded me of when I didn't and how horrible that felt. There were times I had other family members and close friends have problems too. My younger brother had practiced so hard on the clarinet and then because we had left it out in a cold vehicle, it wasn't warmed up for him and his performance competition went awfully bad. Things like that just crush your spirit and heart. And it reminded me of all the other students and how they felt on those bad days. I don't know that I'll ever get back into the competition setting, even though I have thought of judging before. But if I do, I hope that I can remember to maybe do something specifically geared toward those who lose. I don't mean the whole everyone get the trophy mentality, but I do remember how hard some of those kids worked and they either didn't have good training, we're good instructors, or weren't good at what they wanted to do, but it's still crushed so hard. And kids are so young and vulnerable in life.

I wish all of your people the best with this, and of course I wish you and River the best of all! I hope that you're able to really just enjoy the performance most of all. I'm calling it a performance, but I'm not sure exactly what you would call it. Showing? Sorry I can't think to remember the right term you used.
But whatever the outcome, most of all that's what I wish for you. Just to really enjoy and feel that peace and flow about the whole performance and just you and River. I hope it's a positive experience for all the consistent measured effort you both put in! 💛💛💛💛

[gottawonder]

The freestyle thing is kind of a performance, and it gets judged.


Here is an example I found on Youtube of a liberty Freestyle, and it perfectly exemplifies what we're trying to achieve (though lets be fair, this is like comparing the junior high school band to the Philharmonic Orchestra in terms of excellence).

I would say that I can currently do about 70% of what this person is doing (I don't get on River while he's bowing, for example), but everything she is doing is smooth, confident, and the horse shows a lot of energy, and she just does it all perfectly and effortlessly without overusing her cues. It FLOWS beautifully, and her horse never hesitates, never leaves her.

You can see that her outfit, how the horse is decorated, the music, all of it works together. It's a lovely performance.

What I like about it, is it isn't sentimental or overly emotional, just a solid performance with lots of technical excellence.

https://youtu.be/JqYg-VXrOTY?si=Ovy9dJeI3P7eNGLI

I really don't like having freestyles being judged, because they are all so DIFFERENT, I don't know how they can be compared. What I also don't like, is that sometimes people have elements in their freestyles that are "cute" or "sentimental" and you know that they score well on "artistic" points, when I find those elements to be manipulative.

For example, not me competing against them, but they were submissions for our online (thus recorded, by people all over the place) show that had their little daughter riding their horse and making it that whole "love between a little girl and her horsie" thing, when I really wouldn't have thought it would be allowed to have a child who wasn't even wearing a helmet be allowed.

Sentimental elements might be things like "telling a story", like another person at our barn who still did a great job from a technical point, but the artistic side was again, kind of a "little girl and her horsie love each other".

It's a lot like figure skating, in that there is an artistic expression side that is purely subjective, and then points for difficulty/technical accuracy.

The rest of the show is made up of classes like going over obstacles, doing patterns like going around pylons on foot with the horse beside you, that kind of thing.

I would love there to be a way some day for there to be no placings, just people given scorecards personally so they can work out how they could improve, and hey, why not have fewer classes, but after each class as a group spend half an hour working together to improve a bit? Something like that.

I don't know. I just don't think competition makes us happier.