Friday, March 14
Mar. 14th, 2025 11:40 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
gottawonderToday I am grateful for:
My Sweetie, our animals, and for things that make life fun to live.
When I got up and fed the cats/Roxy, then myself, and I logged onto Facebook, my Sister S posted on our family page that Mom fell and broke her hip.
She is apparently comfortable (lots of drugs, I guess) and they are going to do surgery. It is a bit risky at her age, but she pretty much has to have it, because having a broken hip means that without it, she might be bed ridden. More or less a death sentence.
I was in shock for a while, then pretty upset, but there's a point where you just go "well, there's nothing more to be done".
There isn't any point at all in being upset, or worried, or scared. At my Mom's age, she's lucky to be alive, and there has been the feeling for quite some time that she could just go any day.
I am personally glad they are willing to do surgery on her. It means a lot to me that she isn't instantly on a count down to dying from being bedridden.
So, after a being in shock/upset, I figure I might as well just get on with the day. It's not like all of this isn't bothering me a lot, but what else is there?
I went to the barn and worked with River, and while it was a bit loosey-goosey, we did fine. I didn't have to work on a pattern, which is nice. I did stand for a count of 30, but he is kind of wanting to walk away again. Not sure why.
My Sweetie and I had bought tickets to a drag queen night in town, at the great little theater that we like to go to now and then. I figured that we might as well enjoy ourselves, because that's what life is for.
Of course Trainwreck is not doing well. I don't know what to say to her that would help, as her whole thing is "everything is horrible all of the time". You could tell she was very drunk on the phone, and that she's likely just going to be drinking herself to the point of blacking out over and over again because she can't deal with this.
She's telling me again how she doesn't want to live to be old, but I don't think she needs to worry about that. She tells me that she's been having episodes of just waking up on the floor and having no memory of how she got there, but she probably fell. She's got black eyes again. She said she woke up today and her furniture is all moved around and she has no idea how that happened. I suggested that her cleaning person might have done that, but she has no memory of it.
I suggested she might want to go to a doctor again, and she just replies (slurred) "never mind, I'll deal with this. I'll figure it out, but I'm fine".
Well, what can I do for her? Nothing. She wants to drink herself to death, there's nothing left for anyone to do.
I want to live. So we went to our drag queen night.
I got to wear a fantastic vintage sequin shirt. It's SOLID SEQUINS in a black/silver pattern. It's very well made, and I bet it was super expensive new, as it even has these beautiful scalloped edges to the sleeve and the bottom of the shirt. The sequins and beads are still pretty secure. There's no tag on it, and I wonder who made it.
It's very close fitting, and it has almost no stretch, which is partly why I think it's pretty old. Everything past 1990 is stretchy.
The show itself was so much fun! It was meant to be PG, so it wasn't a super sexy or "blue" in any way. The dancing was really good, I was surprised at how good it was, given that it's a small venue in a pretty small town. Kind of a hick town, really.
It was an event put on by the local college, so some of the performers were locals, some were guests from the city. A lot of the audience felt like college students.
I was a bit surprised that some of the performers were just women, presenting as women, but there you go. Why not. Drag seems to be more about the performance than gender.
The audience was pretty animated, which is nice for a change. We've attended some other things at this theater, and I'm surprised when it's something like a pretty rocking band, that the audience is so bland and just sits there.
There was enough clapping and cheering that I half lost my voice.
Someone did notice my awesome shirt, which made me happy. I wasn't sure when I bought this shirt if I would EVER find the right place to wear it, but I did. Now that I wore it once, I have some confidence that it looks good, and I'll feel ready to wear it somewhere else.
I have a problem with actually wearing some of my more showy clothes, because as much as I want to stand out, well, sometimes you don't know if it's "too much".
Part of me really wants to be showier, and to stand out. Part of me is a bit worried about what people will think.
Yet, I LOVE seeing people wear wonderful clothes.
So, it was a good thing we went anyhow. Sitting at home being upset about my Mom won't change a thing. I needed to do something life-affirming.
My Sweetie, our animals, and for things that make life fun to live.
When I got up and fed the cats/Roxy, then myself, and I logged onto Facebook, my Sister S posted on our family page that Mom fell and broke her hip.
She is apparently comfortable (lots of drugs, I guess) and they are going to do surgery. It is a bit risky at her age, but she pretty much has to have it, because having a broken hip means that without it, she might be bed ridden. More or less a death sentence.
I was in shock for a while, then pretty upset, but there's a point where you just go "well, there's nothing more to be done".
There isn't any point at all in being upset, or worried, or scared. At my Mom's age, she's lucky to be alive, and there has been the feeling for quite some time that she could just go any day.
I am personally glad they are willing to do surgery on her. It means a lot to me that she isn't instantly on a count down to dying from being bedridden.
So, after a being in shock/upset, I figure I might as well just get on with the day. It's not like all of this isn't bothering me a lot, but what else is there?
I went to the barn and worked with River, and while it was a bit loosey-goosey, we did fine. I didn't have to work on a pattern, which is nice. I did stand for a count of 30, but he is kind of wanting to walk away again. Not sure why.
My Sweetie and I had bought tickets to a drag queen night in town, at the great little theater that we like to go to now and then. I figured that we might as well enjoy ourselves, because that's what life is for.
Of course Trainwreck is not doing well. I don't know what to say to her that would help, as her whole thing is "everything is horrible all of the time". You could tell she was very drunk on the phone, and that she's likely just going to be drinking herself to the point of blacking out over and over again because she can't deal with this.
She's telling me again how she doesn't want to live to be old, but I don't think she needs to worry about that. She tells me that she's been having episodes of just waking up on the floor and having no memory of how she got there, but she probably fell. She's got black eyes again. She said she woke up today and her furniture is all moved around and she has no idea how that happened. I suggested that her cleaning person might have done that, but she has no memory of it.
I suggested she might want to go to a doctor again, and she just replies (slurred) "never mind, I'll deal with this. I'll figure it out, but I'm fine".
Well, what can I do for her? Nothing. She wants to drink herself to death, there's nothing left for anyone to do.
I want to live. So we went to our drag queen night.
I got to wear a fantastic vintage sequin shirt. It's SOLID SEQUINS in a black/silver pattern. It's very well made, and I bet it was super expensive new, as it even has these beautiful scalloped edges to the sleeve and the bottom of the shirt. The sequins and beads are still pretty secure. There's no tag on it, and I wonder who made it.
It's very close fitting, and it has almost no stretch, which is partly why I think it's pretty old. Everything past 1990 is stretchy.
The show itself was so much fun! It was meant to be PG, so it wasn't a super sexy or "blue" in any way. The dancing was really good, I was surprised at how good it was, given that it's a small venue in a pretty small town. Kind of a hick town, really.
It was an event put on by the local college, so some of the performers were locals, some were guests from the city. A lot of the audience felt like college students.
I was a bit surprised that some of the performers were just women, presenting as women, but there you go. Why not. Drag seems to be more about the performance than gender.
The audience was pretty animated, which is nice for a change. We've attended some other things at this theater, and I'm surprised when it's something like a pretty rocking band, that the audience is so bland and just sits there.
There was enough clapping and cheering that I half lost my voice.
Someone did notice my awesome shirt, which made me happy. I wasn't sure when I bought this shirt if I would EVER find the right place to wear it, but I did. Now that I wore it once, I have some confidence that it looks good, and I'll feel ready to wear it somewhere else.
I have a problem with actually wearing some of my more showy clothes, because as much as I want to stand out, well, sometimes you don't know if it's "too much".
Part of me really wants to be showier, and to stand out. Part of me is a bit worried about what people will think.
Yet, I LOVE seeing people wear wonderful clothes.
So, it was a good thing we went anyhow. Sitting at home being upset about my Mom won't change a thing. I needed to do something life-affirming.
