Monday, October 6
Oct. 6th, 2025 11:48 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
gottawonderToday I am grateful for:
Good sleep.
More or less just getting up to go to town for pottery.
Not too many at the class today, but I did see a few people.
I worked some more on the tea pot, trying to just get "better", but I would like to do something more interesting at some point.
It's funny though, without being particularly deliberate I do have a style.
I felt rushed though, and it always takes so long to clean up.
Then I got groceries.
A surprising little interaction with a guy who by appearances would have looked gruff, a husky guy with a beard, but as I was walking past, he asked if I would like his cart. Sure, it saved him from taking it over to the cart corral, but it was still nice of him to ask.
As soon as he spoke, he broke the image of looking gruff, and came across as kind and almost child-like. Surprising.
I enjoyed looking at food today, not sure why in particular, but I did.
The person at the checkout was VERY chatty, to the point where she was barely doing her job. I bit oversharing etc, but she was nice.
I am always grateful to be able to get groceries, and to have a vehicle, and to be physically able to do this.
I talked with my Sweetie before I headed home, and he had a rock hit his sunroof just right, and shattered it completely. He had the roof closed, so the glass didn't come into the car, but it means until he can get it fixed it's not rain proof, and easily broken into (but not much worry at work because it's a company parking lot).
It's weird, the last time he was going to visit his parents, the alternator on his car went. He's hoping to visit them this weekend, and the sunroof is broken.
When I got home he was using the shop vac to clean up all the remaining particles and sealing the hole as best he could with heavy plastic.
He picked up the type of heavy plastic sled that fits the pony shafts we bought, so yay for that!
I made supper, we ate, and chatted for a while before he headed to bed.
Good sleep.
More or less just getting up to go to town for pottery.
Not too many at the class today, but I did see a few people.
I worked some more on the tea pot, trying to just get "better", but I would like to do something more interesting at some point.
It's funny though, without being particularly deliberate I do have a style.
I felt rushed though, and it always takes so long to clean up.
Then I got groceries.
A surprising little interaction with a guy who by appearances would have looked gruff, a husky guy with a beard, but as I was walking past, he asked if I would like his cart. Sure, it saved him from taking it over to the cart corral, but it was still nice of him to ask.
As soon as he spoke, he broke the image of looking gruff, and came across as kind and almost child-like. Surprising.
I enjoyed looking at food today, not sure why in particular, but I did.
The person at the checkout was VERY chatty, to the point where she was barely doing her job. I bit oversharing etc, but she was nice.
I am always grateful to be able to get groceries, and to have a vehicle, and to be physically able to do this.
I talked with my Sweetie before I headed home, and he had a rock hit his sunroof just right, and shattered it completely. He had the roof closed, so the glass didn't come into the car, but it means until he can get it fixed it's not rain proof, and easily broken into (but not much worry at work because it's a company parking lot).
It's weird, the last time he was going to visit his parents, the alternator on his car went. He's hoping to visit them this weekend, and the sunroof is broken.
When I got home he was using the shop vac to clean up all the remaining particles and sealing the hole as best he could with heavy plastic.
He picked up the type of heavy plastic sled that fits the pony shafts we bought, so yay for that!
I made supper, we ate, and chatted for a while before he headed to bed.
no subject
Date: 2025-10-07 04:32 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2025-10-07 08:04 pm (UTC)The last time they were here was when we were tearing down the trailer and trying to live in the "new" house while it was on blocks...so about six years ago.
They were supposed to be here for about a week, ended up staying for two without the benefit of the "break" they said they would take (they were going to spend a few days with other family in the area to give me a break, but didn't).
When his parents first arrived, I tried to be civil. I made some comment to his father about the nice belt he was wearing. His response was to undo the belt and drop his pants, standing in our driveway in his underwear with his pants around his knees.
We borrowed a camping trailer for them so they would have their own space, but his Mom still walked in on us every morning in our space while we were sleeping. She always just "needed something" she didn't have in the trailer. The bedroom in our house is right off of the kitchen, and we didn't keep the door closed because the cats need to come and go. So if she came into the kitchen, she's looking right into our bedroom, pretty much right at our bed.
She also brought a Keurig coffee maker and set that up in our kitchen, because it was HER preference. Not out in the trailer where they were staying, but in our kitchen.
His Mom insisted that I find a table cloths and cloth napkins for our meals (not just one set, but several, so we could change them as needed). Keep in mind that this is a time when everything was in chaos and very stressful at it's best moments.
They were here during our Anniversary, and I had invited friends of ours over for supper.
His dad proceeded, even though I tried to intervene and ask him to please not discuss this topic at my anniversary dinner (he just laughed and spoke right over me), the reasons why women had to wear white for a wedding (they were virgins, right? But men didn't have to be virgins, har har) and the whole tradition of "lords" getting to have the first night with a bride, har har.
At several points during working outside, his father managed to graze various parts of my body while I was holding things for example, and couldn't move out of his way.
Did they help us? Sure. Were they respectful of our boundaries and of ME? Not at all.
It was ugly. I threw RAGE at my husband that they were never going to set foot in our property again, and he didn't understand, but he finally agreed.
no subject
Date: 2025-10-08 12:16 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2025-10-08 07:26 am (UTC)I have NEVER in my life walked into someone's kitchen and insisted on taking over, or telling them to go get a cloth table cloth when they are in the middle of a stressful move.
I feel like I am being infantilized by his Mom, and sexually harassed by his Dad, and often at the same time.
Years ago at a family gathering at one of his aunt's acreage, I watched my husband's Dad have a really inappropriate "tickle fight" with a girl who was the girlfriend of one of the younger relatives, who was maybe 20. She seemed uncomfortable, but you could tell she too was doing that thing of "what is this, is it JUST a harmless tickle fight, or....?". It was in front of everyone, so it was INNOCENT, right?
I was so disgusted.
Can they be nice? Sure. It's why I kept doubting myself for years about how I felt.
For all that they could be awful, then you'd have one decent interaction with them and wonder if the other stuff was real.
My husband has a sister who completely disowned his parents, apparently because the Dad wasn't able to make it to her wedding (after a lightening fast change of date on her part, and he had a work contract he couldn't get out of).
I actually wonder if there wasn't some other underlying reason, and the wedding was just as good as any excuse to finally cut the ties.