Just feeling a bit overwhelmed.

[gottawonder]

I'm just feeling tired at the moment.

While I know my life isn't "busy" by most people's standards, I feel like there's been a steady stream of things that have to be dealt with, many fairly normal events, but leaving me feeling like I have to be "on top of things" a lot for the past few months.

There have been social things like our friends from Wyoming being here, our friend's birthday party, and my husband's nephew being here this summer. In between there have been other things that are not necessarily "stressful", but that elevate my levels nonetheless.

Visits with friends are wonderful, but they require personal effort. I had to "make the plans" to meet, which means back and forth between them and my husband until we have a date and time and activity. I had to clean my house, and in the case of the nephew being here, that cleaning took place in the middle of the night because they gave me NO notice and were on their way, and the guest bedroom and bathroom were not clean.

It means sometimes extra cooking or food shopping.

For our friend's birthday, it means time online to find a good bakery, then going there and picking up the cake on our way to her house.

It it not without stress, though it's nice to see people.

I noticed my stress in how short my fuse has been lately, and especially when I'm trying to feed the cats. When I'm feeling mellow, I can tune out their howls, but not when I'm overwhelmed.

So I did get kennels to try to make that easier, not sure if it's working.

Our dog Roxy seems to be having age related urinary incontinence (vet saw her a while ago to make sure it wasn't a UTI). I chose not to have her on hormones because she had cancer a while ago. So, she makes a wet spot from time to time, usually when she sleeps.

I guess what I need to do is get her some doggy diapers. Yay.

The turtle tank has a weird "skin" on top of the water, and I did do a bunch of cleaning and water changes, and it's still there. I added beneficial bacteria and that's not doing anything either, so it's looking like I have to do a complete water change and filter cleaning. Sigh.

I was recently frustrated at a person I know on Facebook, because they had a post that asked "what was your experience living before the internet?". I responded that while it is a bit of a den for trolls, if you stick to looking for useful information, it's changed my life. I have access to art tutorials, online Liberty shows and training videos, connections to people I haven't seen in twenty years, maps (again, life changing, since I am directionally challenged).

Somehow, my answer was "wrong" and people jumped on me, saying "how can you say that something that brought us influencers and misinformation politics is a good thing?

My response was "the problem isn't the internet, it's human nature, and that won't change".

Nonetheless, I got bad energy for my honesty.

I've been stressed about events in the U.S. in a way that shows up from time to time in dreams or just as a constant background noise, and once again I am shocked by ANYONE still clinging to their support of certain ideals.

My car needed to go to the shop, only to discover some other minor and repairable issues that are routine, but do mean that my car will need to go BACK to the shop.

I have to go to an eye appointment where I don't know if there will be conflict again or not.

I still need to get another dental appointment for the last filling.

I will be hopefully getting my lipoma removed, which is scary for me, and I don't know how that will go, or if there will be a weird scar or something instead of a lipoma.

I'm trying to work out with friend D what she wants for her pottery equipment. She's been in talks with us for MONTHS about selling it all, but she hasn't come up with a price, and half the time I think she doesn't really want to sell it.

All of the fairly normal stress of running a household, marital negotiations, and normal duties.

Every phone call to family, while not awful, does mean talking about health challenges.

I just had a meeting with the communications committee for pottery, and it wasn't the most positive thing. We're very discouraged over the lack of support from other pottery members, and the executive over trying to do ANYTHING to ameliorate the control issues of S, who is strangling the whole community.

D wants to give up on doing anything, we're having trouble getting anyone else to join our committee, BUT the other two people on the committee seem like the kind of solid, patient, long term thinking people who could really accomplish something if we kept at it.

I sort of feel like I'm holding a lot of things together right now, and I'm tired.

I don't get holidays from these kind of responsibilities.

Comments

[ratunderpaper]

Negative people and chronic complainers sap energy at the best of times, but the flu has made them seem exhausting. How many times can one think I get that you're disappointed or miserable or irritated, but quit trying to take everyone down with you?

[gottawonder]

With my friend D, she has every right to be upset about certain things in her life right now, and it's fine if she vents about it.

When her negativity spreads to the communications committee, that's different. If she were to say "I'm tired right now", instead of "there's no point in us even trying" that would be better for our group.

Our group has accomplished a lot, and could continue to quietly chip away at the walls built by this S person. Maybe nothing huge, but it takes persistence to make change, and it takes time.

If D is unwilling to keep trying, that's her own decision, but she shouldn't discourage the rest of us.

As for you, I get it. Being sick should exempt one from the whingeing of others.

[ratunderpaper]

Airing genuine grievances rarely constitutes whingeing. But "I hate that it's dark by 5 PM", and "I hate winter" are just blankety-blank irritating.

For several days, it hurt to roll my eyes. But things seem back to normal now.

[gottawonder]

To some degree, those are just "noises" people make because they don't like awkward silence. I don't think anyone's supposed to be too wrapped up in them.

[ratunderpaper]

When complaints are pretty much all that some people issue, that's what they'll be remembered for.

[gottawonder]

Yes.

I worry that I am too negative.

Writing here I can see that while I certainly vent a lot, I try to balance that with good things each day.

YET, I know that when you talk with people, the negative has more of an impact than the neutral or positive, and unless you are 95% positive or more, they will likely go away with the impression that you're a very negative person.

I know that's how my husband perceives our interactions as well. I can have a bad day or two, but a pretty good stretch for a few weeks, but I know that the bad days make more of an impression.

[ratunderpaper]

I think pretty negatively, but it's often more realistically negative (the stairs will not be fixed before winter) than pain-in-the-neck negative (there goes another Maple MAGA). Still, I'm learning to write down negative opinions and smirk about them quietly rather than articulate them to the wrong audience.

Look what happened to US government employees when they dared describe Charlie Kirk as a grifter-podcaster who lived and died by the gun instead of a messiah? I don't express opinions like that, no sirree.

[gottawonder]

I do try not to express STRONG opinions unless I know my audience.

[ratunderpaper]

Well, of course not.