Thursday, November 13
Nov. 14th, 2025 01:45 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
gottawonderToday I am grateful for:
Good sleep.
Talking for a short while with D about getting together to look at her kiln and other pottery supplies this Sunday.
I did chores, and let everyone out into their bigger pastures for a while.
I was able to do some long-lining with Dandy.
Then I went to town for my eye appointment.
I went to pick up the mail first, and I parked in front of a medical clinic near the post office. The medical clinic was closed.
An older man politely asked me if I was there for an appointment, I said 'no, I'm getting the mail'. He went into a fairly detailed story about how he had driven there from another town for his appointment, but the clinic is closed.
I asked when his appointment was for, he replied '3:45, but they said there were four people ahead of me so I didn't bother coming until just now'.
So there wasn't anything I could do for him, and I had NO IDEA why he thought he should just show up at 5 without checking to see what time the clinic closed.
He said he was messaging the office, and seeing if they would reply. He was still there in his vehicle when I got back from getting the mail, and he pulled away.
I wasn't worried about him DOING anything, but I was concerned about his cognitive abilities. I thought the whole thing was pretty strange, and sad, and I hope he's okay.
I was at the eye clinic WAY EARLY, and thank God there wasn't any drama about me "missing" the last appointment.
Everything went fine, my eyes haven't changed much, no need to change lenses. I think that's maybe the first time in my adult life that I haven't had to change my prescription.
My husband showed up, and we found frames for him, since he was getting a "buy one get one 50% off" deal since he had to buy special safety glasses for work.
What is surreal for me, is how different today was for me vs. the last time I was at the clinic.
The last time I was having one of those horrible days where NOTHING was going to go smoothly, like I had to fight for every step towards the eye clinic. I was an absolute mess by the time I got there, but I was so proud that I made it there on time, when they dropped the bomb on me that my appointment was for five, not six.
I was immediately upset, because I KNEW that we had made it for six, my husband agreed, and I had confirmed it over the phone the day before. Now I was being told that it was ME who missed the appointment, not "oh, it looks like we must have made a mistake then".
They refused to apologize or acknowledge in any way that they had messed up. I think I could have been okay if they had just said SOMETHING to me like "sorry, that had to be our fault". Anything. Instead I got a blank stare like I was just a crazy woman who missed her appointment and was trying to blame it on the staff.
I was so angry that I had such a crap day, and that the one thing that I really needed to get right, which was to be at that appointment, was yanked out from under me and it all felt so futile.
Yes, I was upset, and visibly angry in front of the staff. I literally was so upset I couldn't reschedule the appointment with them because they only had openings that I couldn't make, and I couldn't even respond rationally anyhow. I just had a meltdown and walked out because that was better than standing there crying or whatever else was going to happen.
What bothers me, is that I felt very much unable to contain my emotions. Sure, I had a bad day, was tired because I didn't sleep well because I didn't want to miss my appointment, but I know that I had a big reaction to something that maybe a lot of people could have done much better in that situation.
I do not WANT to abuse people. I don't WANT to be angry at something that is a pretty small thing on the grand scale of things, but it happened.
Today though, I didn't feel much stress. I got done everything I needed to do without much trouble before I headed to town. The traffic was fine.
Everything was fine at the clinic.
It was FINE.
Why can't that be how every day goes? Maybe sometimes hard things happen, but why do we have days that feel like torture even though they're not THAT BAD? Why are some similar days just so much easier, and six things in a row don't cause us stress?
Well, whatever. It was still a somewhat strained moment for me, mainly because I know the staff are likely all wondering if I'm going to freak out on them today.
Afterwards, we went to the same burrito place, and the same woman was working. I think she's got a crush on my husband. She makes a big deal out of the fact that he likes spicy burritos.
I bet she thinks of him as "Mr. Spicy".
The "new girl" made mine, and she HEAPED the toppings on it. Mmmmm! I felt like a happy python afterwards, and wouldn't have minded some torpor time, but I still had to drive home.
We did go to the Petsmart to pick up a dog bed that could be washed in the machine, and some doggy incontinence diapers for Roxy.
I put one on her, and she laid down on the rug for a while, and she peed and it just ran out the side.
Sigh.
Well, I tried.
Good sleep.
Talking for a short while with D about getting together to look at her kiln and other pottery supplies this Sunday.
I did chores, and let everyone out into their bigger pastures for a while.
I was able to do some long-lining with Dandy.
Then I went to town for my eye appointment.
I went to pick up the mail first, and I parked in front of a medical clinic near the post office. The medical clinic was closed.
An older man politely asked me if I was there for an appointment, I said 'no, I'm getting the mail'. He went into a fairly detailed story about how he had driven there from another town for his appointment, but the clinic is closed.
I asked when his appointment was for, he replied '3:45, but they said there were four people ahead of me so I didn't bother coming until just now'.
So there wasn't anything I could do for him, and I had NO IDEA why he thought he should just show up at 5 without checking to see what time the clinic closed.
He said he was messaging the office, and seeing if they would reply. He was still there in his vehicle when I got back from getting the mail, and he pulled away.
I wasn't worried about him DOING anything, but I was concerned about his cognitive abilities. I thought the whole thing was pretty strange, and sad, and I hope he's okay.
I was at the eye clinic WAY EARLY, and thank God there wasn't any drama about me "missing" the last appointment.
Everything went fine, my eyes haven't changed much, no need to change lenses. I think that's maybe the first time in my adult life that I haven't had to change my prescription.
My husband showed up, and we found frames for him, since he was getting a "buy one get one 50% off" deal since he had to buy special safety glasses for work.
What is surreal for me, is how different today was for me vs. the last time I was at the clinic.
The last time I was having one of those horrible days where NOTHING was going to go smoothly, like I had to fight for every step towards the eye clinic. I was an absolute mess by the time I got there, but I was so proud that I made it there on time, when they dropped the bomb on me that my appointment was for five, not six.
I was immediately upset, because I KNEW that we had made it for six, my husband agreed, and I had confirmed it over the phone the day before. Now I was being told that it was ME who missed the appointment, not "oh, it looks like we must have made a mistake then".
They refused to apologize or acknowledge in any way that they had messed up. I think I could have been okay if they had just said SOMETHING to me like "sorry, that had to be our fault". Anything. Instead I got a blank stare like I was just a crazy woman who missed her appointment and was trying to blame it on the staff.
I was so angry that I had such a crap day, and that the one thing that I really needed to get right, which was to be at that appointment, was yanked out from under me and it all felt so futile.
Yes, I was upset, and visibly angry in front of the staff. I literally was so upset I couldn't reschedule the appointment with them because they only had openings that I couldn't make, and I couldn't even respond rationally anyhow. I just had a meltdown and walked out because that was better than standing there crying or whatever else was going to happen.
What bothers me, is that I felt very much unable to contain my emotions. Sure, I had a bad day, was tired because I didn't sleep well because I didn't want to miss my appointment, but I know that I had a big reaction to something that maybe a lot of people could have done much better in that situation.
I do not WANT to abuse people. I don't WANT to be angry at something that is a pretty small thing on the grand scale of things, but it happened.
Today though, I didn't feel much stress. I got done everything I needed to do without much trouble before I headed to town. The traffic was fine.
Everything was fine at the clinic.
It was FINE.
Why can't that be how every day goes? Maybe sometimes hard things happen, but why do we have days that feel like torture even though they're not THAT BAD? Why are some similar days just so much easier, and six things in a row don't cause us stress?
Well, whatever. It was still a somewhat strained moment for me, mainly because I know the staff are likely all wondering if I'm going to freak out on them today.
Afterwards, we went to the same burrito place, and the same woman was working. I think she's got a crush on my husband. She makes a big deal out of the fact that he likes spicy burritos.
I bet she thinks of him as "Mr. Spicy".
The "new girl" made mine, and she HEAPED the toppings on it. Mmmmm! I felt like a happy python afterwards, and wouldn't have minded some torpor time, but I still had to drive home.
We did go to the Petsmart to pick up a dog bed that could be washed in the machine, and some doggy incontinence diapers for Roxy.
I put one on her, and she laid down on the rug for a while, and she peed and it just ran out the side.
Sigh.
Well, I tried.
no subject
Date: 2025-11-14 08:41 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2025-11-14 09:23 pm (UTC)Thankfully she seems to be unconcerned about wearing the diapers, though she doesn't like the part where her tail has to go through the little hole.
She doesn't seem ashamed of leaking, or wearing the diapers, which is good. I certainly don't give her any grief for the leaking.
She wore the diapers last night while I was on the computer and watching a show, and she wet two fairly well, even though she had outdoor time too. That surprised me.
Yet, she didn't leak during the night on her new bed where I laid some towels over the top of it.
All of this is just trying to see what works. I don't want her to have to wear the diapers that long each day, I'm concerned about her getting a UTI.
I'm trying to understand if there's just a certain time or circumstance where she leaks, or if it's all the time...?
I would love to have this sorted out enough that our house doesn't smell like dog whizz.
no subject
Date: 2025-11-15 08:30 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2025-11-16 06:46 am (UTC)She gets to go out when I get up, or right after getting fed when I get up.
Not long after, we go outside to do chores where she has minimum half an hour to be outside and sometimes she does No. 2 more than once.
Then that's when I generally head out to see River, or do other things and she's in the porch for a few hours.
My husband lets her out as soon as he gets home if he's home before me, or I let her out when I get home.
We eat and do whatever until it's night feeding for everyone, when she gets let out immediately after eating.
Then in maybe another two to three hours we go do chores again, where she gets a fair amount of time to do business and meander. She generally does No. 2 again either this time, or at the time right after eating.
She knows how to ask to go outside, and if she needs it, we let her out again whenever she asks.
The leaking is something that seems to happen when she's deeply asleep and relaxed. I generally see a wet spot either on her bed or a rug after she's been relaxed for a while. I imagine it can happen several times in an evening. She doesn't seem poo incontinent, though once in a very blue moon she has a poo accident.