Tuesday, February 25

[gottawonder]

Today I am grateful for:

Decent weather; lots of sun.

Finally getting to ride River today. No one was at the barn on Sunday so I couldn't ride then. We had a good ride, he felt forward and willing.

Lots of people around today, and lots of socializing. I was inwardly laughing about one teenager, as we talked about what a monster her brother is, while I still had to acknowledge that most brothers are, indeed, monsters.

I took the time to clean and oil my saddle, and one person that I chat with a lot kind of hung out and kept me company while I cleaned. This was actually really nice, to be chatty like this with so many people today. This is just as much why I want to be part of a barn like this as the actual horse riding. I need to connect with people. The barn has really kept me sane while my husband has been gone this last month (yep, a month).

Coming home and having a nice bath. I have to say, I probably don't do this enough for myself. Being alone so much, and often not having to be around people, or going to the barn where being a little stale isn't a big issue, I probably only bath a couple of times a week. I should make a habit of at least a quick dousing every evening. I think I would be happier with myself.

Watching "The Green Book" and really enjoying it. It's about Doctor Shirley, a wonderful black musician, and his Italian driver Tony, as they go on tour in the deep South in the 1960's. It's funny, because even though one can be aware of the racism of that time (though I did think the '60's were better than that), there's something different about seeing a personal experience played out this way. It's hard for me to imagine being denied service in a restaurant or bar because of color, or to simply have no protection from the law, or to imagine being told you can't use the same washroom as the the other people in the room. To be beaten simply for being "in the wrong place", and so on.

Somehow when I was younger, movies like this, while making an impression, still seemed sort of distant and somewhat fictional. Like mythology (that's kind of how movies about the Middle Ages feel, or westerns, even though they too, were real). It's hard to accept sometimes, that all of this is true. That it still is true.

Monday:

Our friend came by to help me check the septic tank/pump. The alarm indicating high levels came on yesterday, and apparently the breaker at the power outlet had tripped a while ago, and that meant the pump wasn't moving the fluids out into the septic field. I reset the breaker, and today we lifted the heavy lid off the tank to see if it was pumped out, and it does appear to be at a proper level again.

I'm grateful for our friend's help.

I sold the bag of costume jewelry to a lady in town, with no hassle. Sometimes trying to use the buy and sell can be frustrating because people flake out or keep changing the meeting place/time. I sold the jewelry for a pittance (five bucks) just for the sake of my time. I hope to use the buy and sell more, to part with stuff. Some things I do want money for, rather than just donating it (though it wouldn't really have bothered me to donate the jewelry).

I went to the gym again, and had a good workout. I am feeling a little better about working out in front of people. I don't feel self-conscious in a busy gym, but this gym can make me feel weird because it's small, and it's often me and one other guy or something, and that's a very intimate situation. Maybe once I get to know some of the other people a bit it'll be better. I'm just not used to being in a room with one or two other strangers while I'm doing awkward things, half the time with my butt in the air.

Working on another painting.